I’ve been wanting to write about this topic for a very long time, but somehow I never actually sat down and wrote my thoughts on a paper for it to happen, until now.
Jealousy is a natural human behaviour. We all get jealous sometimes, even me, so this is not a judging post. I get extremely jealous if for example my puppy is cuddling with someone else. It is normal. But as every human behaviour it has a limit, and once that limit is passed, it becomes a poison. Same thing can happen with being kind, too much kindness is bad, no matter how good kindness in itself is.
When it comes to jealousy many people pass the line. And now I’m not talking about jealous girlfriends all over the world, it is a whole different topic. The type of jealousy I’m going to explore is the one, that the people closes to you feel… your friends.
These type of people simply have this wide range of feelings towards other people who are, in their perception, more successful then themselves. They project their own unhappiness to others success, and in order for them to feel less miserable. Sometimes they even create their own explanations to justify why is someone else “better” then them, and how easy it was for that other person.
Let’s take an example.
When something good happens in your life, you immediately want to share it with your family and closest friends. They are the ones always by your side, and you love them. So it is obviously important for you to feel their support, and to share this happy news with them.
Once you tell them everything, you see that they are not quite happy about you. They are pretending to be, but it’s not the same. You feel that something is off.
How do you feel?
First you would deny it, or feel sad about it. Then immediately after you would feel responsible, and it would take away from your happiness, from something you earned for yourself.
That’s not the solution.
The next time, you feel like your closest friend or family member is not giving you the attention you deserve, especially when something huge is happening in your life, you need to acknowledge that and keep it in mind. (Of course something might have happened in their life, what is impacting them, but in many cases that’s not it.) When a person gets jealous of your success, tell them about it, and then ignore it. Remember that the next time, you will not be able to count on them, and just find that other person who will be as happy as you are, and with whom you can truly share your success.
Success doesn’t come easy. People work hard for it. And even if most of them do not showcase the bad days, and all the challenges they needed to overcome, just keep in mind, that you know how hard you’ve been working to get where you are. And that you deserve every bit of it.
Don’t let other people’s negative feelings take away the hard work you’ve put into your own future and life.
It’s not easy, but in the end, it will be worth it.
Once you ignore the negative people, life will be much better. You just need to identify them and ignore them. Never eliminate them, don’t burn bridges, just know what their true colours are. And most importantly, know that you deserve to surround yourself with much better people.